It was my very own pity party.
After a night of rest, I was reminded of a story of Nehemiah in the Old Testament. He decided to take on the huge job of rebuilding Jerusalem's city wall that had lain broken for ages. He did the fundraising. He hired the workers. He rallied the troops and defended the city. It was his mission. In the middle of all that determination, effort and sweat, people tried to pull him away from his project. They didn't have the same passion that Nehemiah did. They didn't think he would be missed or that it was very important. But with conviction, Nehemiah refused to be distracted:
Tears dried, I remember that I am committed to this season of taking care of and teaching three young children that God has given to me. I cannot let other people who don't share my vision pull me away from the job at hand. I can't check out. I can't run away. I can't jet off to exotic locations and forget the responsibilities I have here at home. It's my job. It just isn't as easy as it used to be to take a trip out of town or snag coffee with a friend. But it's only a season...I am doing a great work. I cannot come down. - Nehemiah 6:3 (The Message)
I don't ever want to regret doing what I felt was the right thing to do.
We all have different callings, different circumstances, and different goals.
I will not feel guilty for saying, "I'm sorry. My work is too important to stop now."
And I cannot lose focus on why I am here and what I am doing.
After all, I'm the only mom Bella, Brody, and Boone have :-)
So, in whatever season you are in or whatever your mission, set your eyes on the prize- even when you're tired:
You know that many runners enter a race, and only one of them wins the prize. So run to win! Athletes work hard to win a crown that cannot last, but we do it for a crown that will last forever.- 1 Corinthians 9:24-25 (CEV)And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus...so that you will not grow weary and lose heart. -Hebrews 12:1-3 (NIV)